What Kind of Girl?

By Caroline Kautsire

Caroline has lived a very interesting life. What kind of girl, indeed? 

Growing up in Malawi, Africa. Caroline felt out of place, she didn’t like to do the things that Malawi girls were supposed to. She didn’t like cooking, and she hated wearing chitenje, an African wrap that all good girls were expected to wear. Highly influenced by American T.V. in her youth, she began emulating the catch phrases and attitudes of the actresses she watched. 

In the 90’s poverty struck Malawi, and the upper class neighborhood she lived in with her family was targeted by thieves. Awoken by a stampede outside her window, she is terrified when crashes and bangs start erupting from inside the house. Alone and afraid, she begins imagining all the horrors that might be visited upon her family. Gathering every bit of her 6 year old courage, she heads for the security alarm in the hall, hoping the thieves wouldn’t find her before she was able to trigger the alarm. Amazingly she is able to press the alarm before she is found. Her older brothers find her in the hall and bring her back to their room. The security guards eventually arrive and chase off the thieves, but not before they clear out most of the belongings in the house. She learned at a very early age that there was evil in the world that can and would touch her life, and it has left her with repeating nightmares from that night.

She shares many stories with the reader, getting drunk off half a beer at the tender age of eight, and getting burned in the kitchen while learning to make traditional meals. Dealing with bullies and not conforming to the standard “girl stereotype”. 

Passing a high school (Americans would consider it middle school) entrance exam at the age of 9, Caroline is sent to a boarding school 150km away. There she becomes involved with choir, plays, and sports - even though the students still make fun of her for competing with the boys. In school, she also finds her passion, her love of literature and languages. Still struggling with fitting in, she hides her true feelings from her fellow students. She shares her disagreement with the “growing bodies” talk the nuns gave the girls in her town, and the struggle to seem as “adult” as the other kids in her class.

Throughout the memoir is the recurring theme of “going to America”. As an American, I can’t imagine what it’s like growing up in Africa, but after reading this memoir, I have a better idea of life outside my own bubble. I love her journey, and how she shares it with the reader. I highly recommend this book.

I received this book for free for this review.

Caroline Kautsire is originally from Malawi, Africa, and is currently an English literature and writing professor at Bunker Hill Community College and Bay State College in Boston. She has published poetry and flash fiction that explores themes such as searching for identity, struggling with intimacy, and learning to love. Also a stage actress and director, Caroline was nominated for best-supporting actress by the Eastern Massachusetts Association of Community Theatres for her performance as Trinculo in William Shakespeare’s The Tempest. She also teaches public speaking and has given several inspirational talks at colleges in Boston.